Metacognition: Jane Eyre Mashup

      A mashup is defined as a "creative combination or mixing of content from different sources," and though I wasn't before aware, is reflected in several types of art. I'd figured it to be a free art form collecting popularity but not yet clearly defined or momentous--but mistaken, I found five-month old "United States of Pop 2009 (Blame it on the Pop)" by DJ Earworm--a popular song that has secured 36.4 million views on YouTube in its short life--terms itself a mashup. It features one to two line samples from the top 25 hits of 2009, and though seemingly different in key and time signature, the lyrics of the songs fit together under an umbrella theme--picking ourselves up after being metaphorically knocked down. Additionally, what sounds like the drum beat and guitar tab to the Black Eyed Peas' "I Gotta Feeling" unremittingly plays in the background, adding to the illusion of a "single consciousness." DJ Earworm, who also produces mashups of individual artists' work, has said of his experiences with it, "It's great when I get to do a mashup for an artist, because it allows me to really dig deep into a single act and really see what makes them tick." Essentially, the artists' work creates or leads him to sculpt the themes for his songs, and when he looks at them with lenses to filter out anything that doesn't relate to the theme--he finds deeper implications about the theme itself. Though his songs are angled to draw popularity versus sparking the intellect, I found the fundamental steps of both of our processes were similar.

      While working on the mashup assigned in English with my partner Jordan, I arrived at a set of realizations relating to the media quoted in the mashup and its sources.  We began the mashup by inserting large blocks of text from printed and online sources that were broadly related to enlightenment. We imported paragraphs satiated with content of personal moments of enlightenment, dialogues in which characters analyzed their own epiphanies, and descriptive passages which commented on the nature of enlightenment. Then, it was important not to mechanically cut out pieces of text with specific names or places, as the later integration of those into the mashup would make it more unique and interesting. Though we found it important to be open-minded and ambitious while we quarried printed and online media for possible quotes, we ensured our sources met a certain standard; just as DJ Earworm hadn't scraped for theme-related sentences in psychology self-help forums, we were not to skulk about on Yahoo! Answers seeking personal enlightenment experiences.  In fact, I found that average experiences of people could be articulated through the layers of depth in the mashup, or simply through use of a more sophisticated piece of literature whose main character was slightly out of the ordinary but not unrelatable.

       However, this process led to the satiation of individual quotes with diverse ideas. To cut the quotes to the bone would have required more time and collaboration. Due to diametrically opposed schedules, Jordan and I could only meet to work together when the order of the mashup elements was being finalized and the site was being put up. Thus, the duties of the mashup creation process had been split between us, with me making sure I dug up enough quotes to exasperate as many aspects of enlightenment as possible, and with Jordan continuously interpreting added elements and ordering them, leading to depth. We each spent many hours on the Google Doc. adding or editing, but realistically with a two-dimensional virtual document and less than a week's worth of time (conflicting with a major holiday and athletic competitions), the closer, more collaborative and mutually beneficial work environment I envisioned had to be compromised in search of a more practical and efficient way to complete the project.

      If asked what I would improve upon regarding our group dynamic or collaboration, the pressing circumstances in mind, I would probably be more efficient and manage my time more effectively. Had I completed my quarry for quotes several days before, it would have allowed for mutually invested time in the trimming and organizing of the mashup elements. I was hesitant to pull the plug on my  constant import of quotes into the project because I feared there would not be enough concrete material to continue. But had I initiated a sort of preliminary organization process of the elements--even something as simple as categorizing--I could have familiarized myself with the material we had thus far, and gained a more refined image of what quotes we needed. Additionally, I could have been a direct participant in the trimming of sentences that didn't directly relate to enlightenment, thus tightening the focus of the mashup. After sampling Austin and Declan's completed mashup--each quote of which is a line, or at times two--I realized the power of conciseness in a project like this. Their mashup was not only elegant and flowed collectively, but was direct, structured, and wise.

It Matters: The Yin-Yang

       Toward the end of our reading of Jane Eyre, we briefly discussed  how the success of Jane's relationship with Rochester could be explained by the principles of the Yin-Yang. Jane emerged from her experiences at the Moor House more independent and self-actualized, whereas Mr. Rochester's blindness had forced him to retract his authoritarian air and accept dependence on another human being. Thus they became closer to equals, with neither yielding to or exercising mastery over the other; rather, they became a whole entity through embodying aspects of each other.

       The theory behind the Yin-Yang holds that each side of it holds a part of the opposite side because qualities constantly become each other in a cyclical process, partially comparable to Hegel's dialectics.  No quality ever exists in its absolute state, but may achieve temporary dominance.  However, when a large imbalance occurs between elements, Chinese traditional medicine cites this the cause of illness. The Yellow Emperor of the Han dynasty argued that if the Yang, or male force, was excessive and strong, one would face repeated exposure to heat, which would damage the spirit and lead to severe pain. If the female force, or Yin, was too strong, one would become excessively cold, which would cause the body to swell and eventually injure the spirit. Either infirmity would lead to death if left untreated.

      In our modern era, the Yin-Yang is more commonly applied to the political or social aspects of our society, but still relates to modern medicine. In one sense, the "mental health" category of medicine can offer effective therapy to those who are depressed or only channel negative energy. Along with the principles of the Yin-Yang, such people sometimes undergo trauma or pass through difficult times that escalate their negative emotions, and opt for help when at the peak of discontent, so health issues don't emerge or they don't take their own lives.  Hopefully this help facilitates their fundamentally feeling the "opposite" of before, while still recognizing their negative emotions as a part of them. However, on the flip side, modern medicine also enables psychiatrists to prescribe medication to people suffering from grave mental disorders and further delay constructive methods of psychological treatment in favor of temporary alleviation of symptoms. 

      In the political field, diversity between opposing agendas and moral standards has been said to have positively impacted our society. Psychologist Jonathan Haidt argues that through embodying ideas that fundamentally deviate from our own, such as with party doctrines, we can "cultivate moral humility." This is important because it is crucial to interpersonal understanding and cooperation. In his New York Times Op-Ed article, David Brooks describes that "For decades, people tried to devise a rigorous “scientific” system to analyze behavior that would be divorced from morality. But if cooperation permeates our nature, then so does morality, and there is no escaping ethics, emotion and religion in our quest to understand who we are and how we got this way." Hence, it becomes clear that the process by which our behavior has been analyzed can be characterized by the Yin-Yang; it has shifted from traditional thought, to scientific, systematic evaluation, and now to a system where science is predominant but more conscious of humanitarian aspects of our development. In totality, however, the fact that psychologists and behavior analysts are embracing the principles of the Yin-Yang, consciously or not, and its presence in Jane Eyre and even relationships today, shows that its teachings are still universal and pertinent, though the traditional internal and medical applications of the Yin-Yang did not heavily spread to the Western world.

360 Degrees: Life Simulation Games

    In 1985, Activision released Little Computer People, a life simulation game created by David Crane for C64 computer systems. The game involved observing and interacting with a "little computer person," or LCP, who resided in what is essentially a two-dimensional doll house. Rather than controlling your LCP, you would interact with him through typing out suggestions for his activities (depending on his momentary needs), rewarding him with gifts with which he could spend his time, or inviting him to play parlor games. Each LCP had his own personality specifications and randomly chosen name, and for many this personified their LCPs, allowing families and friends to bond over what their respective LCPs had done the night before. Little Computer People has functioned as a blueprint for later life simulation games, notably the Sims.

     Between the release of LCP and The Sims came SimCity, a "system simulation" game released in 1989. In this game, you are able to create cities populated by "simulated citizens," and have full control and authority over the city's development. SimCity has no final objective or goal planted in it, but the appealing challenge is to build a city, perhaps your ideal city, that is able to sustain itself through the simulation. You want successful industries, an attractive lifestyle, happy people, and tax revenue so you can further develop the city.

     Then after, came "The Sims", "The Sims 2", and more recently, "The Sims 3." These are life simulation games in which you create simulated people, or Sims, move them into a house or build one yourself, and then control their actions throughout the stages of their lives. In the most recent installment, The Sims 3, there is no concrete objective other than optional fulfillment of the “Lifetime Wish” you select in “Create a Sim” mode. It is beneficial, however, for your Sim to develop skills associated with that wish, or undertake a job that relates to it, because you will gather more lifetime happiness points and be able to purchase special abilities for them. There is a separate currency, called “Simoleans” that the Sims make from work and that you use to purchase basic commodities and furniture, and build houses.

     You can choose to create your Sims or use a set of pre-made families. The “Create a Sim” function, however, is so comprehensive and multifaceted that it enables one to almost accurately represent a person from real life, both physically and mentally. Physical traits can be customized from weight to the color of hair roots and tips, and mental aspects, from favorite food to a set of five different personality traits, which could include “hot headed” or “charismatic.” This wide range of customization options is one of the appealing aspects of the Sims series, and is also reflected in the amount of options and flexibility you have in designing their homes.

     Another aspect of the Sims 3 that one might find attractive is the fictional narrative behind your characters; though it is simulated, the story can be engaging and yet realistic and relatable to some degree. Players see it as a more interactive, entertaining, and definitely engaging activity than perhaps writing a story or reading a comic. This can greatly fuel "escapism", a large attraction for any life simulation game, defined as a "habitual diversion of the mind to purely imaginative activity or entertainment as an escape from reality or routine."  Other players may also seek to project people and situations from their own life into the Sims in an idealistic but nonexistent way.  Because the game is so absorbing, it is important to raise the question of whether living in an idealistic world improves or worsens actual life. From reading posts on the Sims 3 community site, it seems that routine escapism, possibly to a virtual world they find favorable to their actual reality, can prevent people from taking steps to solve issues present within their lives. In addition, many people use cheat codes to rack up millions of Simoleans in the game, which can support the highest standards of luxury, and is unrealistic. However, it’s also important to question whether absorption in a life-simulation game can have positive effects. In the Sims 3, for example, improving in skills associated with a Sim’s academics or job will greatly boost their confidence about work, happiness level, and actual improvement within that field. This purely logical nature of the game may motivate some people to take constructive action to improve their lives, or reconsider their priorities.

Dialectics: Empathy and Alienation

      Within the last few decades, our attitudes towards the poorest, or perhaps those who struggle most in our society, have seemingly changed marginally. Middle class citizens complain that while they toil at the office for hours on end trying to make a living, people who choose not to work are dawdling in the streets, begging for food or money, and spending federal tax dollars making trips to the emergency room to get necessary medical care because they don't have insurance. Upon encountering one another in person, the homeless are regarded by citizens (putting the government aside) in a hasty, indifferent, and disgusted manner. In The Pigeon by Patrick Süskind, protagonist Jonathan describes the envy he felt for a neighborhood homeless man in France who would use the money he'd collected from passersby each day to buy wine, bread, and sardines; every evening, he'd have himself a brilliant feast before curling up on his sheet of cardboard for a post-dinner nap.

     Even with the explosion of popularity in rap music, a decent amount of which alludes to the struggles of ghetto America and the country's less privileged and more troubled youth, middle aged adults have still struggled to even sympathize with such groups of people. In The Pigeon, it took the homeless man's urination of a brown liquid nearby a row of cars in a parking lot for Jonathan to empathize with the scrutiny under which the man had to commit business that should have been private, and feel bad for his poor health. Not many suburb-dwellers in the US have this perspective, or would divert much attention from their busy lives to take steps to care for an underprivileged homeless person encountered in the city.

     I'm reminded of Elvis' song "In the Ghetto" which depicts the sad life of a young man born into a ghetto--he begins to "roam the streets at night" once he becomes hungry, and reverts to theft and violence to get food and clothing. One verse reads,

"Oh people don't you understand

The child needs a helping hand

He'll grow to be an angry young man someday

Take a look at you and me

Are we too blind to see?

Do we simply turn our ears and look the other way?"

     These lines speak to a valuable conjecture about our indifference to the struggles of the underprivileged classes--perhaps our ignorance stems from the fear of accepting the graveness of their situation; we have an underlying fear, or nightmare, of what would happen if all of our possessions were stripped from us, and we were demoted to such a standard of living. We then comfort ourselves with "I'd never let it happen to me," and then we question why they let their lives slip away, or do little to revamp them. We begin "us and them" thinking, forgetting what is in front of us is a human being. And in poor neighborhoods, where gang violence often escalates, we find it difficult to compare ourselves to them. 

      On the news for a time, there were briefs every night about youth that had been killed by virtue of gang warfare--sometimes innocent passersby caught in crossfire--and perhaps from this we have accepted that turbulence as their lifestyle, and disrespected the fact that they value their lives lowly enough to assimilate into drug circles, or gangs. We do not empathize with the tears we see the mothers cry because we would never let our children mingle in such an environment, or be put in such danger. However, we do not realize the reality of their situation: in such portions of society, it's "kill or be killed"; if one does not make themselves a 'bully' they'll be the next 'victim.' Reputations are important, getting a lot of people following you is critical, especially if you land in trouble. One would also be surprised by the degree to which people involved in such practices do it for money or goods or protection for their family. And even a gang their are strong relationships; one member would throw themselves into a violent conflict to protect another.

     To balance, par say, our "alienation" of these classes of people, the government/media of our country as an institution is providing a means for empathy for them. Where reputation matters, one cannot pose themselves as weak or vulnerable, hence there is little exchange of emotions, and a lack of the empathy that would enable people to work towards healing. Expressed emotions are mainly restricted to anger, of a very defensive nature, that boils at the tip of weakness. Fear of defeat, for example, can spur aggression; in a National Geographic television episode about Louisville Prison in Ohio, one of the inmates remarked, "if anybody messes with me let them know I'm going to **** them up." However, music, specifically rap, can facilitate empathy between people. A popular rap song a few years ago by Maino called "All the Above," depicts how the artist went from being a nobody on the streets, going through the same struggles his intended audience does, to being a rich musical artist. One verse reads,

"Really what do you see 

When you looking at me? 

See me come up from nothing, 

To me living my dreams.

I done been to the bottom, 

I done suffered a lot, 

I deserve to be rich, 

Headed straight to the top."

      What is important about lyrics like this, and similar songs, is that the message of triumph, success, and victory over a system previously 'set in stone,' is not only embraced by the audience it is seemingly meant for. Through being applicable to a wide variety of people, the lyrics not only empathize with the current graveness of struggling peoples' situation but also allow middle and upper class citizens to empathize with the struggles of the less privileged, and in doing so see the value of their lives. It is the young people who listen to this music that truly ignite the dialectic between empathy and alienation of the lower classes. Not all of them, to be sure, but many.

     Many people also claim that rap music is detrimental to society because the lyrics can sometimes be so defensive and aggressive that it is dangerous for one to associate with them-- not only because of what kinds of actions they could inspire, but because of their negative impact on one's psychological health (seeing oneself as invincible, destroying everything in one's path to get something, etc.). But, when the artist and the audience member are not affiliated by means of gang or circle, shared anger can be a means of empathy, as much as it can negatively affect behavior. In popular rapper Eminem's "Recovery" album, his song "Not Afraid" features this catchy chorus,

"We'll walk this road together, through the storm

Whatever weather, cold or warm

Just let you know that, you're not alone

Holla if you feel that you've been down the same road."

     Here we see an attempt to relate to the audience member, and distinguish himself from other rappers in the sense that he truly understands what people are struggling through. This does have some verity because of his made-public battle with drugs. On an emotional level, it's important to note how he comforts the audience member, though a seemingly aggressive fellow, with "you're not alone" and "holla if you FEEL you've been down the same road." This is interesting, considering that Eminem upturned his role in rapping through this song.


      I don't know how popular it was among people who had been listening to his other music, however, I think it wouldn't be bad for them to continue to idolize him, for this song balances softer understanding (as we see in the chorus) with more aggressive, triumphant, anti-institutional lyrics. Many struggling people aren't exposed to any soft empathy, partially because showing weakness in those parts makes one vulnerable to scrutiny or attack, and therapists aren't always available (though new programs are being launched now to counsel troubled youth). Guantanamo Bay, for example, has shown us what a lack of counseling can lead to--due to poor treatment, the prisoners that leave often do with far more anger and anti-American sentiment than when they arrived. One is now in fact a potent Al-Quida leader.

     In terms of how empathy and alienation of lower classes function as a dialectic--it happens on different levels. In terms of citizens, if we shift too far towards empathy with the struggling people, we begin to think we are of similar nature, then get nitpicky when cultural, behavioral, or psychological differences arise, and are again overcome with the importance of those differences, and revert to attitudes of indifference, or alienation. Also, political empathy towards those who struggle makes them less likely to try and escape their condition, or rise out of their horrid situation. However, if the government 'ignores' the lower classes, it is marked an inevitable shortfall of capitalism, and they don't want that. Hence, it's evident that neither empathy nor alienation exists in absolute, however, in being opposing forces they hold the dynamic of our society together. At points, empathy is greater than alienation, and at points vice-versa, because of a variety of factors. 

iMedia: Mansion Over The Hilltop by Elvis Presley

  
      In November 1960, Elvis Presley released the gospel song "Mansion Over the Hilltop" in his album "His Hand in Mine." Originally written by Ira Stanphill in 1949, it's been sung by many choirs and recorded by various musicians over the last several decades. There aren't many documents online describing the song's popularity back in the day, and it isn't one of his 30 #1 hits I have on a CD--but, if you read through YouTube video comments and online reviews of MP3 versions of this song, you'll find Elvis' rendition touched the hearts of many at its time. Most people have pleasant recollections of their Aunt or grandmother singing it to them as children.
    
      When I first came across this song in the "recommended videos" section of my YouTube page, I thought it was going to be a one or two minute simple rendition that Elvis had done of a classic song--a lesser known work, and one that Elvis redefined but didn't reinvent. However, I soon realized that though the song seemingly was a qualitative description of a serene, specific setting, like many of his other songs it attacked a greater theme of life. In this case, the entirety of the song turned out to be a metaphor for heaven, and his relationship with it.
The chorus reads:

"I’ve got a mansion just over the hilltop
In that bright land where we’ll never grow old
And some day yonder we will never more wander
But walk on streets that are purest gold"

     His clear references to a "bright land" (heaven=light) where we'll never grow old (human desire for immortality, and the energy of youth) align with the Christian conception of life after death. Also, we see that he rhymes "old" with "gold," which alludes to the value of young age.

      When connected with the first verse of this song, where Elvis sings, "I’m satisfied with just a cottage below, a little silver and a little gold" (describing his physical life on Earth) this verse has even more significance. The duality between the cottage and the mansion poses an interesting interpretation of the song. He describes the "cottage below" and the "mansion over the hilltop," the language of which seems to imply that both of those are slightly out of reach. 
      Perhaps he wishes he could be modest enough to commit to living in a small cottage among nature or by a sparsely populated region, but has a overly strong desire for the material things in the world--after all, he does follow-up the cottage line with 'a little silver, and a little gold,' which show that yes, he has a little, simple living space, but there's a desire for luxury sparkling in his heart. Even when he talks about heaven in the next verse, he remarks that there will be "streets that are the purest gold" there, which asserts his material desires.
      Then when he talks about the mansion, maybe it's 'over the hilltop' and barely visible because while he'd like to believe there's a life after death, and a beautiful heaven he'll come to, he's not entirely sure it exists. Perhaps he realizes to some degree that his interpretations of heaven are too far-flung or idealistic, but seems to still be allured by the prospective beauty of that place.

This interpretation can be further extended through the next verse of the song:

"Don’t think me poor or deserted or lonely
I’m not discouraged I’m heaven bound
I’m but a pilgrim in search of the city
I want a mansion, a harp and a crown"

      In the second line, Elvis mentions he's not 'discouraged.' This means that even though he has a yearning for riches and luxuries that he can't seem to accommodate with his inadequate finances, the fact that he will go to heaven and encounter all the wealth he's been missing, gives him hope. However, his connection to being a pilgrim searching for a city, conveys his lack of innocence. 

      It reminds me of the way Europeans colonized America, and how they displaced, killed, or fated the natives to lives of hard labor. They got satisfaction over being the superior rulers over a social group they subordinated and controlled, and befitted economically while the majority of natives working for them were dirt poor or even slaves. Not that Elvis is singing about taking anything over, but there's a strong feeling of 'greed' he expresses that isn't very different from colonialists in America. 

      Greed being a sin, and sins being something that would prevent one from being accepted to heaven, I sort of see that line as explaining why Elvis' description of heaven was so surreal and dreamy in the first place. He feels his ability to 'get into' heaven is slipping away from him, and feels insecurity because of that, but still tries to convince himself that there will be a bright and sunny future ahead. His insecurity at this moment is illustrated by how he pronounces "heaven bound" in the second line of that verse "haven-bound." Above all, he desires a feeling of security, and comfort.

      In totality, this song has several routes of meaning. Most prominently, it has an interesting connection to Elvis' life. It's said that his family was "superficially religious," meaning they believed in God and were members of the church, but visited infrequently. While Elvis was said to have embraced the notion of "Jesus" when he was younger, this belief is said to have dwindled as he became an increasingly popular celebrity. In addition to his questionable religious devotion, John Whitehead of the New York Times recalls that "ministers publicly attacked him, even threatening to lead a crusade to have him arrested if he set foot in their communities." Hence, the meaning behind this song almost seems to resonate within Elvis' own life; he was condemned by the global messengers of divine insight, or our religious authorities, did not foster belief in God to any measurable degree, probably in part due to the pressures and problems within his own life--and yet he wanted a drop of hope for the future, something that could promise to relinquish him of his pain.
      This theme seems to also appear in John Whitehead's article in the NY Times, where he explains that, "...a victim of success, Elvis became a parody of himself and of modern, materialistic America. And in the end, like so many of the generation he spawned, Elvis was a solitary soul trapped on that lonely street that leads to the Heartbreak Hotel." This short quotation, among other things, really shifted my attention to the external influences on Elvis' life. Earlier I had asked myself, if Elvis did not invest much belief in God, and was attacked so ferociously by religious authorities, why did he continue to so passionately pursue gospel music? I knew the reason he'd gotten into gospel music was more his appeal than his religious commitment--Sam Phillips, the man who first recorded Elvis, claimed he was looking for "a white boy who could sing like a black boy and catch the beat of black music." However, this quotation, speaking of Elvis as a "victim of success" and a "solitary soul," made me think that after his self-imposed doubts of God and condemnation by religious authority, he felt so alone and afar that he yearned for acceptance, or the supportive feeling of God, or the future under the comforting rays of heaven--and through gospel music, sought to call out to God for those things.

      Though at the same token, his popularity was contagious among young people, and seemingly spread around the more the older, traditional generations heaved criticism in his direction--and its very possible his love for singing, gospel specifically, and this fame that brought about the emergence of a new type of generation in America, was enough to push him to continue creating the masterpieces he did.

Metacognition: The First Semester

     This first semester of English has been valuable to me for more reasons than I can name. Its most constructive contribution to my method of learning and working, interestingly enough, lies in its destruction of my previous conceptions of the ideal English classroom. As the year has progressed, I have become increasingly aware of the degree to which this process built its nest in my subconscious, and gradually manifested itself in my thoughts, ideas, and actions.

     Our first assignment—to analyze a time when our cognitive state shifted—was more about internal exploration as opposed to fitting our brains in the mold of external forces. True, we did approach the paper through the human-identified and explained concepts of “cognition” and “the mind,” and the paper encouraged we describe an eye opening and enriching experience, but in the end, those specifications did not limit or trap us, rather they allowed for growth. In all my years of school, I have never had an assignment with directions that allow for focus, depth, and structure, and yet an overwhelming degree of flexibility and opportunities for unique development of ideas.

     Rereading my essay again, it is evident that I was initially shaky when working within a structure of open mindedness, free flow of ideas, and deep understanding of a situation. Even though I discussed my mental conception and stance about different philosophical ideas from several angles, it really wasn’t good writing. I had set the stage for depth by outlining these topics that I had to further study and seek to understand, but my rusty and selective knowledge of the relationship between philosophy, religion, and cognition created several crevices within the essay.

     Upon analyzing this, I came to several distinct conclusions. The most important would be that, rather than using the mechanism of selective knowledge and understanding to achieve focus in a paper (which is obviously flawed but when it’s masked in verbiage you can’t even tell anymore…), it is important for one to first seek to understand/analyze something to the greatest degree possible, and then selectively choose which aspects of that complex mental discussion to include within the essay.

     I once read a book in which a character said that if anything, it is better to have ignorance based on understanding than understanding based on ignorance. In a sense, I think this explains the philosophy behind the essay and other assignments this year; the stress is not on the outcomes of the thought and learning process as much as the process itself. We are not forewarned of the teacher’s expectations and offered advice as to how we should adjust our selective views to fit their perspectives, rather, we are exposed to the true nature of deeper, unified analysis, strong and valuable connections, and through understanding, and expected to adopt that ourselves. Recently I became aware of how much meaning that added, in my mind, to English class. Unlike other classes, which are more passive and teachers are concerned with how much material can be condensed into a day’s lecture, in English each day we seem to make connections with important themes of life, and historical events or patterns throughout history, and that has really has forced me to ingest its value.

     However, I must take a second to step back and mention that I was not initially open and receptive to this method. I have recently struggled with achieving balance between sophistication, elaboration, and complexity and my personal voice and thoughts in writing. Through all the different cognitive phases I went through, I had always viewed writing as serious and formal, even when my writing did not necessarily emulate that. It was difficult and almost impossible, then, to visualize what a step-by-step, constructive, and “playful” approach to writing—a sort of synthesis between what I struggled with—looked like. And on top of that I was reluctant to gradually “improve” in writing, I wanted to get it done and do it right the first time.

     Soon I found out this was very ineffective. Part of the reason I was able to unwind the tightly interwoven strands of my writing process—which had recently constricted my creativity and energy—was the prevalence of positive and encouraging language. In English class this year, I have noticed a lack of abundance of words such as "study," "interpret," and "conclude.” Though these words do surface time to time in class, there is a different and deeper stigma associated with them; they aren’t defined only by systematic evaluation of a piece of writing, as in the past. Mostly however, in their place I have noted words and phrases like grow, develop, meaning, understand, analyze, look into, explore, think about, and feel, which create a completely different atmosphere within the classroom. Within my thought processes, those words promote balance, curiosity, and thorough exploration of ideas. Interestingly enough, last week I read a New York Times article about new discoveries of the subconscious mind, that explained people "become more competitive if there’s a briefcase in sight, or more cooperative if they glimpse words like “dependable” and “support” — all without being aware of the change, or what prompted it." While this quote pertains more to the spontaneous events of day-to-day life, it can still be applied to the dynamics of our class and our approach to completing assignments.

     Overall, I find that while my development has not exponentially soared or crashed, a somewhat solid foundation for improvement has been built within my mind. With all the issues outside of school I’ve had to endure, it means a lot that I am beginning to truly lay the first few brick layers for literary exploration. Through the example of Mr. Allen—though I have “known” for a long time—I’m starting to “understand” and feel the power and necessity of literature. Not only does it help with language fluency, vocabulary, and grammatical structure, but rhythm, musicality, and other techniques we have discussed in English class—things that I’ve felt before (and in some cases mimicked) but never truly been able to identify. It also means a lot to me that I have an effective base of communication with Mr. Allen, and that has encouraged me to be more open with myself and others and work through both actual difficulties and illusions of problems, while staying aware of my cognitive state throughout.

Blogging Around

I first commented on Stephanie's post titled "Metacognition: Get Organizing (A Tribute to Aristotle)."

"Firstly, I'd like to say that you were very successful in covering all the different interesting aspects of your room. Your blog post really intrigued me, yet it was practical enough to be understood and applied to one's own organizational projects.  Personally, I was mostly surprised by the love you displayed for all of the things, from instruments to old projects or essays, in your room. It shows that you are a constructive and high-achieving person with a very well developed sense of strong work ethic and the rewards that come with it. 

As far as structure, you started with analyzing your psychology in regards to what degree of organization you prefer for your room to have, how that influenced your feelings, what you cleaned first and last, then finished with a particularly interesting quote that almost related back to your first few paragraphs. The revolution you made while explaining your project--by which I mean connecting your first and last paragraphs--was notable. In the first one, you explained how you believed your room was relatively in order but there was a lot of hidden clutter and that it was "agonizing" when life is too busy to organize your belongings "in the moment." In the last paragraph, you essentially delved into the dynamics of our thinking as pertaining to organization, and referred to an insightful quotation. In both, you believed in the strong implications of a well-organized workspace, but transitioned from essentially describing your personal feelings to achieving a state in which you understood them and were able to make specific connections between your situation and psychologically and philosophically intriguing ideas. Also, your reading a book in the middle was almost symbolic of the "enlightenment" you gained in the process (I'm aware it didn't shift your thinking too much but just to mention something). Finally, I thought it was interesting how your perspective and psychology about the organization of your room was pretty in order to start with, like your room itself, but as you progressed in your cleaning project, you really internalized the reality of your project and its implications. Your mind essentially, then, achieved a state of understanding and rather than feeling, "knowing" the dynamics of organization in the big scheme of things. This is not unlike the way that your room, through becoming more orderly and rid of "hidden clutter" became more unified and in solving the problem of unnecessary complexity, perhaps more simple and direct to perceive."

I then commented on my fellow classmate Elizabeth's blog titled "360 Degrees: Number of kids in a family."

"Elizabeth, your blog really opened up a new aspect of life to me. Before I read your blog, I was well aware of the duality centered around the fact that while lack of money does prevent many couples from having children, in some cultures it is the reason why couples choose to procreate. On one hand, parents don't have children because they don't want to provide a child with a life filled with struggle, but on the other hand many couples in the deepest of poverty try to have as many children as possible so that, upon growing up, these children can be helpful with domestic duties such as gathering food, and so the parents can have someone to care for them in their old age. However, after reading your blog, I became aware of the degree to which the former of your claim I mentioned (lack of money prevents couples from procreating) has very strong implications in society.

Offspring is no longer a sole joy resulting from communicated love between people, however it is purposely sought in order to raise children that will actively engage in society and continue lineage. Much more care is taken to the specifics of how children are raised at home, as there exist thousands of parenting books about how you can establish stronger bonds with your children and raise them to be healthy, happy, and successful adults. For many prospective parents, the increasing complexity of our expectations of our children (as you mentioned with postmodernism) makes them believe that they perhaps are not economically suited to raise a well-rounded child (ie, involved in athletics, music, has access to learning resources), and that is sometimes positive because it avoids having children plunge into a future of struggle and uncertainty. However, it also perhaps causes self-conscious parents to worry about whether they are capable or incapable parents, willing to persevere with the many implications of parenthood but doubtful about whether their child will enjoy the environment they are in, and be happy, and they fear the possibility of that not happening. It's pretty interesting how this is related to post-modernism, because lately there are more financial support programs, parenting classes, books, and psychologists or counselors than there were a couple hundred years ago. We have higher expectations for our children but that is met with increasing gentleness towards those who, because of money issues, learning problems, or a disability can not achieve this ideal image of a child in the 21st century. To sum up, I am on one hand supportive of the trend of our culture and yet I'm a little disappointed that economic problems and doubtfulness undermine the ability of certain families to have offspring."